Smash 365: PERFECTION

We keep searching for perfection, and in our search we find that everything in the universe is perfect except the humans. The sun is perfect, the stars are perfect, the planets are perfect, but when it comes to the humans, “Nobody’s perfect.” The truth is that everything in creation is perfect, including the humans. ~Don Miguel Ruiz, The Fifth Agreement

What stops us from seeing ourselves as perfect? Redefine “perfect” for humans and make a list of the things that make you perfect.

My Thoughts:

In one word, EGO stops us from seeing ourselves as perfect.  ‘Perfect’ does not mean conceited or arrogant.  ‘Perfect’ to me means living in a state of openness and love, tethered to our Creator.  When we live in the state of ego, we depend on our attachment to others as the reflection of our selves.  This, I believe is a hurtful way to see ourselves because how others see us comes from their reality and their ego.  Depending on our attachment’s moods and whims, one day they may see us as good; the next they may see us as causing pain.  So while we are affirmed with love one day, we are suffering and in pain the next.   But in reality, we all cause our own drama.  The responsibility for our life is within us.

 I am not speaking of a child because children are born innocent.  Children have to rely on their caregivers to protect them and nurture them.  But as adults we must take responsibility for our actions and strive to let our ego die.  The Creator is calling our Soul.  Our Soul longs for a reunion to the Creator.  When we refuse the call, we become frozen in our ego.  I am not speaking of physical death.  It is a spiritual death and rebirth while we are here on the Earth.

The thing that makes me ‘perfect’ is my belief that I originate from the Creator and I am a part of the Creator.  Because of this, I am a part of the Universe which lives in the Creator.  I am in a continuous search for my Soul.  But I do realize that ‘perfection’ can be fleeting.  I am also still human; therefore the ego will be with me until the end.  The trick is to learn to live as the Self because the Self is your Soul, the Soul is love, and love comes from our connection to the Creator.

Peace,

Nico

Smash 365: The River

Use this prompt to inspire. Write for 5 minutes:

“Paddling the canoe down river, I finally understood what Dad meant. “

 Photo Courtesy of Rainbowcabins.com

RESPONSE:

**As a young child, my dad would take me to the river to fish.  It was so peaceful.  We could stand in silence for hours, yet feel connected to each other.   It did not matter if we ever caught a fish.  It was something about nature.  I could never put it into words, but I could FEEL it.  Before we would leave to return home, dad always said, “Life is like a river.  Always remember, live your life like a river.” 

He never went into detail, probably because of my age.  Then suddenly, unexpectedly, one day, he was taken away.  Through the years, I always returned to the river because of the memories.  But, I also needed and longed for his thoughts about living life like a river.  One day, “paddling the canoe down river, I finally understood what Dad meant.”

The river flows onward without clinging to where it has already been.  It does not look back with regret the path it has taken and carved.  It has no fear of the inevitable upcoming boulders.  If it comes upon a DARK hole, it fills it up without dread. It moves toward something bigger than itself without the worry of losing its control or losing its identity.  It merges with the vastness elegantly and gracefully, becoming one, contributing to the larger body all its power and energy.

This is my ultimate goal…to let go of the ego and become one with the Self; to flow in harmony with my Creator; to live in respect of nature and FEEL its connection; to join the vastness and dedicate all my power and energy for good; to help others heal; to play my role in helping humanity heal.  This is how I want to live the rest of my life.  This is where I will find peace.

 

Nico

  

**The part about my father is fiction.

STOP CHILD ABUSE.  IT MURDERS THE SOUL.

Smash 365: Write: THE JOURNEY TO PRIMORDIAL SPIRIT

"Use this prompt to inspire. Write for 5 minutes:

Instead of landing the space shuttle on earth, its captain steers the shuttle into…"



PHOTO:  Journey to Primordial Spirit: Copyright by Kati Astraeir



After travelling in the Darkness for many light years, the captain felt a calling to a different way.  Thinking that the earth had become a less than desirable place and was filled with dead end roads blocking their desired destination, the captain suddenly decided to listen to intuition and order the ship into hyper drive.  “Let it Be, that we travel to the realm of the unknown,” the captain said to his crew. 

Suddenly, they arrived in the most unimaginable, extraordinary sphere.  The Land of Atonement (at-one-ment) was before them in all its glory and serenity.  It will be in this land that the captain and the crew will come to know each other and their Self.  It is here that bliss (Creator) and pain (humanity) will join to become one.  This will lead to living in peace, love and compassion until all are taken back into Eternal Life.

Peace,

Nico

Ten Minutes of Silence: Smash365

Time + Silence = Tranformation

There was a time when ten minutes of silence would have been excruciating for me to bear.  For in this silence I heard deafening screams. I felt immeasurable suffering.   At that time, my mind broke.  Unknowingly, I became a traveller on the road to wholeness; to the Self.  I had no idea what this undertaking entailed nor did I know what it was called when my journey began.  I was asleep.  

In no way am I claiming that I have arrived at my destination.  I think my life will be a lifelong journey.  How is it possible to ever stop learning; to stop growing emotionally and spiritually?

Now the silence beckons me.  For, in silence, lies transformation; a connection to others, to spirituality, to the Self.  In fact, there are times when I have to MAKE myself leave the silence and interact with the world.  I have to keep my life balanced.  I have to try to stay centered.  It is in this state where I find the most serene peace. 

My goal is to not allow negativity take away my peace.  This is much easier said than done.  But, I do believe I can accomplish this with determined practice. 

Peace.

Nico



The OPEN HEART Is on Fire: The Path to Your Soul’s Freedom

"The most powerful weapon on earth is the human Soul on fire."~~Ferdinand Foch

In the past and because of the nature of my past, i.e. extreme, long term child abuse, my heart was closed not only to me, but to all of mankind.  There was no fire in my soul.  Since, I last wrote, for the most part I have turned inward again.  Some people may think this is selfish or egotistical.  However, I believe it is the path to freedom; the path to letting go of the negative; the path to overcoming the ego; the path to my Creator.

It is not so much that I ignore the world and my surroundings.  I do not…I continue to live each day to the fullest, but my focus has been on the opening of my heart.  I believe it is only when we examine our ‘heart’ which I am using as a representative of our soul, that we can become whole.  We must face the pain of our existence, our humanness.  Even if you have not suffered child abuse, you have suffered.  You will recognize and find your suffering in your defenses; in your reactions to situations; in your ‘shadow’ or ‘light’ aspects of your personality, better known as your ego.

Until recently, I felt I had to encapsulate my heart.  I felt I had to protect it from being vulnerable, from being abused, from feeling, from all the ‘evil’ I feared so vehemently.  I was dreadfully wrong.  This has been the destruction of my soul, my Self.  Ironically, the walls I built to protect myself were the walls that were causing my pain.  For to block out ‘shadow’, we also block out ‘light’.

I am not saying that we go out and find people to abuse us or hurt us or cause us pain—quite the opposite.  We go out in the world and live in compassion and love.  Do to our human tendencies, we all will have pain put in our life, sometimes we might even be the cause of another’s pain.  Hopefully, the pain we cause will not be purposeful; it will be coming from our subconscious or even conscious inadequacies.  We must remember this one basic fact: 

“When someone acts out, when they yell or conduct themselves with arrogance or are purposefully hurtful, it is usually because THEY are hurting in some way, whether they will admit it or not. You have a choice: be in compassion or sit in the pain and resentment that they have shared with you.”  Ayamanatara

We must acknowledge, admit, and accept our inadequacies to overcome what keeps us un-centered. This can be very difficult and extremely painful.  We do not succumb easily to the realization that some of our aspects are on the ‘shadow’ side, or even on the ‘light’ side.  In all aspects of our personalities there are two sides:  shadow and light.  Neither one of them are ‘bad’ in and of themselves.  It is when we are living in the extreme of one or the other that they can become destructive.  It is the extremes that cause destruction and negativity. 

Think of it this way:  In an addiction, is it really the substance that is ‘bad’ i.e. alcohol, food, drugs, religion, etc. ?   I view it more as using the substance to either extreme…this is when it becomes an addiction.  Of course, people realize the ‘shadow’ aspect of addiction…which would be the overuse of a substance.  But have you ever thought about the ‘light’ attribute of addiction—the total abstinence of a substance or the total alignment with a certain world view.  This can be an addiction also.  This too can be an escape from your reality.  It can lead to intolerance, a feeling of superiority and living in illusion.  It can also lead to our causing pain to our fellow humans.

If we try to live centered, in compassion and love, with an open heart—here we will find our protection.  It is in this state of being centered where we will find our true selves.  We will find our Creator, our God, our Source, our Higher Power, and our Self (or whatever terms you choose).   We will need no other protection. For if you honestly know, if you truly believe—when you are openly connected and centered in your Belief, there is nothing you cannot overcome.

Today, I have emerged with a fire in my Soul I have never felt before.

Peace,

Nico



LIFE IS WORTH LIVING

LET THE TREE OF LIFE GROW

William James:

Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.

For so many years, life has been a very scary thing for me.  My motto used to be “Life is worth LEAVING”.  It has only been recently that I have felt life is worth LIVING.  I could not find anything to fill the emptiness, the void I felt inside.  I kept searching for others, for things, to stop the pain for me.  It does not work. 

 

The only thing that has helped me has been to look deep inside; to face the pain, fear, and abandonment I have felt since as far back as I can remember; to bring all of my emotions into conscious awareness.    I HAD TO FEEL IN THE PRESENT. 

 

Since I was never allowed to do this freely as a child, I had to learn to do it as an adult.  I had to learn to try to stay present in the pain and not dissociate.  To do this I had to learn to feel the emotions and not just the physical pain.  My abuse left me numb.  When I first started therapy, I could not name the emotions I felt.  Other parts of me carried the anger, the pain, the fear and all my emotions.  Everything was compartmentalized into “neat” little parts…I use the term ‘neat’ loosely, as there was nothing neat about any of it.

This is not an easy process.  I think unless you have been abused in some way or have experienced some sort of trauma, you cannot understand just how hard and painful this lesson is to learn.  You just want someone to help you, to stop the pain; to stop the longing for a loving mother.  I used to beg my therapist to “Please MAKE IT STOP”.  But, all he could do was sit with me through the pain, help me to breathe; help me to come back to the present. 

 

He could not take it away; cutting could not take it away; alcohol could not take it away; drugs could not take it away.   I thought for years I could not live through any more pain.  When in reality, all this pain has made me stronger.  It has made me a more understanding, empathic person.  I would not change it now, even if it were possible.

What I would like you to take from this is that it is never too late to heal.  Please do not give up.  Just, when you think the darkness is going to consume you, a ray of light will show up.  Even if in the beginning it is dim, know that it grows brighter every day you keep surviving. 

Believe in yourself.  Never give up.  Survivors are strong people.  Soon you will THRIVE.

Peace,

Nico





Change Your Thinking by Maryellen Smith #Trust30 (Post 45)

“If you can’t change your fate, change your attitude.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

At any given point in time, you’re only one thought away from changing your thinking. What thought can you change today?

(Author: Maryellen Smith)

Why is it that when I ‘Google’ this quote, it is attributed to “Amy Tan”?

Fate…what exactly is your definition of fate? 

What definition did Mr. Emerson or Amy Tan have in mind when ‘they’ wrote these words?  Do you believe it is some named or unnamed “force predetermining events” (Encarta Dictionary: English).  Like with all things that are not actually a science, but instead a faith, a belief, a truth, an educated guess, there are many ways to view this concept of fate.  I deeply respect all views and by writing my beliefs, in no way am I trying to negate yours.

Ultimately, we all have the same fate.  We all die.  Our time on this earth is limited and what happens to us after is truly a mystery.  Please do not misunderstand the point I am trying to make…I believe in something more, something Higher. But in my humanness, I feel that I cannot define it.

However, I will start with this quote:

“Fate makes our relatives, choice makes our friends.”

(Jacques Delille) 

While we may have been fated to be born into this world, what we do while we are alive is our choice.  No, we do not have much control over what happens to us.  But we do have total control over our attitude, how we react, and how we live this life we were ‘given’.

Why should we so carelessly attribute what happens to us as human beings…to our lives, to the air we breathe, the water we drink, the food we eat to fate.  Are we afraid to accept responsibility?  Are we too lazy to ‘do the work’?  Are we not willing to take control of our ‘fate’?

These are the questions I have lived for many years now.  I wanted to blame my past, my abusers, my choice-less choices for the path I was on…if I took responsibility for my pain, my depression, my anger, my fear, my lack of faith, what exactly would that mean.  If I was responsible and did not like what was happening…

I WOULD HAVE TO CHANGE!  I would have to choose another path.

Who in their right mind would want to descend into the unknown? 

What I did not realize was that I was already traveling in the ‘unknown’.  I was living in the illusion of familiarity, when in reality, every moment and every breath is always unfamiliar, unknown.  But, it was not until I lost the illusion, until I consciously descended into the ‘unknown’ that I started to become an individual.  I was finally born out of the fate that was originally given to me.  It was in this darkness that I became aware of my true Self.  It was here, from the bottom of a deep well that I started to rise up, to choose, to create, to LIVE. 

It is not a perfect world.  Sometimes, I still fall into darkness.  But, with the thought of my new awareness so illuminating, I am not as fearful as I was before to continue my creation; to continue on my life-long journey to the Self.

This is the fate I choose.

Not this:

Peace, Nico

Deep in Your Soul by Michael McFadden #Trust30 (Post 42)

“I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What message is yearning inside you? What is something you know deep in your soul? Don’t look for someone else to describe it. You do it. Write it down. Write it as a poem, a sentence or even just a string of words. Just make sure you get it to paper.

(Author: Michael McFadden)

“Tell me what you know…”

When I think of the universe, all of its wonderment, all of its beauty, all of its pain and struggles, I know nothing.  I am unequal to this task of knowing.   “In the beginning”…what, when, how?  What was before the beginning?  Is the answer simply God, Yahweh, Creator, Source, Higher Power or whatever word I have forgotten?  Who or what else is out there to which we have not connected?  My knowledge, the world’s knowledge is ineffective, inadequate.  We live in a state of blind faith, blind chance.  Truthfully, I believe we are basically “all unknowing”; “all un-powerful”.

We have evolved over time and hopefully we will continue to evolve for the better.  Change is all around us.  Change is the only constant (Heraclitus).  We are in flux.  We flow, always forward, whether we choose it or not. 

So what exactly do I know?

Every day we all create…

consciously or unconsciously,

good or evil,

love or hatred,

kindness or cruelty 

acceptance or rejection

encounters or avoidance

happiness or suffering

peace or war…

This is our humanness.  The choice is ours.  What will I choose today?  What will you choose today?

I want to live today in a conscious state; to do good for someone because of my love for life; to be kind so as to promote acceptance; to create encounters which lead to happiness; and to feel inner peace.

Nico

Legacy by Tim Belber #Trust30 (Post 41) STOP CHILD ABUSE

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
 

One definition of legacy is what someone feels, thinks and says when they hear your name. What are you doing today to build the legacy you want?

(Author: Tim Belber)

While it may be the ‘greatest accomplishment’ to be myself ‘in a world that is constantly trying to make’ me something else…it does not always feel so great!!  Also, by all means, I am not saying that I am always being ‘myself’.  There are many times when I still live behind my mask.  Sadly, until recently, I never could discern the difference between the two.  I was not in touch, nor aware of the difference between the many masks I wear and the ‘real’ me.  I still have amnesia when some of my 'masks' are living this life.  Now that dear readers is living in a dissociated state.  I have many ‘states’ (not united!) that deal with day to day living.  For me to give my parts the name ‘masks’ seems a little harsh.  They have their own names.  But if I am honest, they are masks, albeit, protective masks.

 It has been my experience that many people do not understand or believe in the diagnosis Dissociative Identity Disorder.  Honestly, what you believe is irrelevant to me.  I am not here to debate the topic.  But, I am here to tell you it is alive and well, right here in “River City” (from the movie The Music Man).  It is a survival technique.  As I MIGHT have mentioned before—surviving is not thriving.  While D.I.D. kept me ‘sane’ throughout my childhood, the chaos and suffering it caused as an adult seemed like INSANITY.  However, several doctors have reassured me, much to my dismay that I am NOT insane.  There have been many times when I felt it would be preferable to be psychotic and crazy.  Crazy would be easier to accept and understand.  I am not one to write down and share publicly the gory details of my abuse.  I do not like the sensationalism of abuse.  In my opinion, it is distasteful and tarnishes the sacredness of the subject.  I find it very ironical that something so pernicious, caused by pure EVIL can be held sacred.  But the topic of child abuse is and should be held in sacrosanctity.

Today, this is what I am doing for my legacy.  I am shouting to anyone that will listen to my screams to STOP CHILD ABUSE.  I am trying to bring awareness to the subject.  People, please listen to me.  It really occurs to more children than which you are aware.  It is not some imaginary occurrence.  It does not just happen every once in a while.  If you suspect abuse you need to observe and determine if you need to report it.  Children are precious.  They are our future.  We need to protect them and teach them self-respect, values, kindness, and caring.  WE NEED TO LOVE THEM WITH ALL OF OUR HEARTS. 

My legacy : 

CHILDREN ARE THE MIRACLES OF LIFE AND SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH. 

I WILL REPEAT THIS MESSAGE UNTIL THE DAY I TAKE MY LAST BREATH:

STOP CHILD ABUSE.

CHILD ABUSE MURDERS THE SOUL.

Number 1 Passion by Eric Handler #Trust30 (Day 36)

What is your #1 passion in life? Now, imagine what would happen if you incorporated that passion into your life daily. Write down your passion and keep it close to you. Remind yourself of it daily, just like brushing your teeth.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” ~William Shakespeare

I have numerous passions at this time in my life.  To narrow it down to one is very difficult for me.  However, evolving into a new creation is my greatest passion.  My thinking is in the process of being changed.  

I am learning to unlearn; I am learning to break out of the mold into which I was poured; I am learning to think for myself, unburdened from the ‘tapes’ of the past; I am learning to be ME.

I will continue to do this each day for the rest of my journey—that is my hope. 

Without freedom from the past
there is no freedom at all...
because the mind is never new, fresh, innocent ...
~ Krishnamurti ~

Peace

Energy by Julia E #Trust 30 (Day 35)

“The world belongs to the energetic.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s easy to blame our failure to meet our goals or to live our dream lives on a lack of energy, and we don’t always stop to think about the quality of energy in our lives. Yet we can choose to create and manage our own energy flow.

Think of an instance when you’ve been so involved in an activity that you’ve lost track of time, and then identity the passions and energies you were feeding. Who was there with you? What were you doing? What will you do to make time for moments like that one more often?

Dear Blog followers:  I lose track of time every day!!!    It is called D.I.D.  Now to get serious about this post!

Energy can be a fleeting desire.  But, I have found when a passion becomes activated within, the energy flows freely.  To create and manage our own energy flow then we must learn to live in our passions; we must learn to have a passion for life in its entirety.

There are several instances when I become totally absorbed in something and do not realize the time is passing.  They all relate to my passions.  The first one is writing--whether it is writing poetry, venting in my journal, or writing for the #Trust30.  I also lose track of time when I am camping in the mountains and sitting in front of a campfire. Then of course, there is always music. 

As far as the energy I am feeding, they are similar for all three activities.  It is my journey inward, towards growth; a time of reflection; a time to just be me; a time to be one with nature and connect to the Creator.  When I am in this state, usually I do not even notice who is with me.  It is hypnotic.  The energy passion emits flows into me and I flow into something else larger than me.

In my opinion, anytime we can reach this level, we are creating the ‘breath of life’.  For me this means we are uniting the mind, the body and the spirit to flow as one.  Our life is breathing.  We are in the ‘Self’.  "Energy is eternal delight." - William Blake

Allow all the creative experiences and choices of life to open your heart and move you towards your joy and truth.

Overcoming Uncertainty by Sean Ogle #Trust30 (Day 29)

Overcoming Uncertainty by Sean Ogle #Trust30 (Day 29)

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. Nothing can bring you peace but the triumph of principles. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Write down a major life goal you have yet to achieve or even begin to take action on. For each goal, write down three uncertainties (read: fears) you have relating to each goal. Break it down further, and write down three reasons for each uncertainty. When you have three reasons for your fear, you’ll be able to start processing the change because you know where the fear stems from. Now you’ll be able to make smaller changes that push you towards your larger goal. So begins the process of “trusting yourself.”

Until you are at peace with yourself and the life you are living, uncertainty will rule your actions and decisions.  You will flounder not only in your principles but in all areas of your life.   No one can give you peace.  Material possessions will not bring you peace.  Peace is a continuous search to live your life without causing ripples; to be true to your principles.  It is a conscious choice.

 

One of the definitions of ‘principles’ is a primary source; origin.  The triumph of our principles is when we come to know and live within and through the ‘Self’, our primary source, our origin.   There lies our peace.

 

Fear IS the destroyer we must conquer.  On Day 19, I wrote about fear.  I do not think we need to ‘know where the fear stems from.’ (from where the fear stems…Sorry!  This IS a writing challenge!).   Fear is the root.  It has the capability to grow deep within the soul.  We all need to finally realize that anger, hatred, prejudice, war, genocide, abuse, and so many other evils ORIGINATE from fear.  Fear is lack of knowledge; un-acceptance; the self-inflated ego.  FEAR IS LIVING OUTSIDE OF THE ‘Self’.  My advice:  Go find your ‘Self’.  Everything else will fall into place.

My sincere, deepest apologies Mr. Ogle, but honestly, with all due respect, do we need to break it down?

 From Day 19:

“There is nothing to fear but fear itself.”-- Franklin D. Roosevelt

This is such a profound statement.  When I think about it, FEAR IS the greatest emotion ‘to fear’.  In my life, fear has been the worst enemy.  It has stunted my spiritual growth; it has caused me to live in stagnation; it kept me in the state of ‘reacting’ to people and situations.  From fear, anger and hatred mushrooms and takes root in the soul.

PEACE!

Alive-est by Sam Davidson #Trust30 (Day 28) MY ANSWER WITH PICTURES

Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind. If we follow the truth, it will bring us out safe at last. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

When did you feel most alive recently? Where were you? What did you smell? What sights and sounds did you experience? Capture that moment on paper and recall that feeling. Then, when it’s time to create something, read your own words to reclaim a sense of being to motivate you to complete a task at hand.

MY TWO MOST RECENT ALIVE MOMENTS HAVE BEEN DURING TIMES OF

CREATING……..Words, growth, thoughts and ideas, life, new friendships, and the Self.

AND...

SHARING………All the above!

I SAW MYSELF AND THE WORLD THROUGH  DIFFERENT EYES.

I TOOK THE TIME TO SMELL THE

‘ROSES’.

I WAS AT HOME WRITING FOR THE #Trust30 CHALLENGE AND AT GROUP.

I EXPERIENCED A TOTAL FEELING OF



PEACE

I would like to thank everyone who contributed to my “Alive-est” feeling up to this point in my life.

Peace,

Nico

Personal Recipe by Harley Schreiber #Trust30 (Day 27)

I do not wish to expiate, but to live. My life is for itself and not for a spectacle. I much prefer that it should be of a lower strain, so it be genuine and equal, than that it should be glittering and unsteady. I wish it to be sound and sweet, and not to need diet and bleeding. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

 Think about the type of person you’d NEVER want to be 5 years from now. Write out your own personal recipe to prevent this from happening and commit to following it. “Thought is the seed of action.”

To be Me and not to be me, that is the answer.  

Tomorrow, much less in five years, I do not want to be the same ‘me’; I do not want to have lived in the stagnant waters of non-growth.   Each day life presents us with so many possibilities.  I just need to learn to take my blinders off, recognize what is being offered, and run my race as if it were the last.  However, I will race true to form, following my core beliefs.  By doing this I will not cause  major ripples in the waters of life, where we all reside.

I want to feel Alive, Aware and Awake; the “AAA”, no not the wrecker/travel service.  If, and when I ‘break down’, I do not want to be towed to a repair shop.  I need to be able to look inside, run my own diagnostics, find the problem, and repair what has been broken.  If I need help, I will ask.  I am not that close-minded to think that others cannot help.  But, first I will turn to Me.

I do not want to be given a pre-determined route to my destination.  Yes, I need a map.  But, PLEASE spare me the highlighted route!  I will create my own.  If I am travelling on the main highway and decide to exit onto the scenic route, or even the uncharted, unmapped route—of what concern is it to anyone else.  If I get lost, once again I will first turn to Me.  My GPS signal will always be on, just in case I need to be found in an emergency.  I am getting older and health can give us surprises.

For the most part, I am a loner.  I would like for this to change.   I have no need to bask in the glory of others.  Glory is an unstable, ‘glittery’ pedestal on which to perch.  It is fleeting.   I do not need to see my reflection in the eyes of others.  I want to develop friendships that are mutual, having similar visions, travelling on similar paths.  I believe we all need connections. 

Hopefully, if I can fashion my life from this ‘Me’, there will be no need to purge regrets; there will be no hunger from ‘dieting’ in life.  The me will no longer need to bleed, because she will be transformed into Me.

This is my ‘thought’ and my ‘seed of action’.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrWX5Bs0cSA&feature=fvst

Thistle and Weeds by Mumford and Sons

"Plant your hope with good seeds.  Don’t cover yourself with thistle and weeds.

Rain down, rain down on Me."

P.S.  "Ohio Impromptu" is a very good read!!

PEACE!