I NEVER MEANT TO HURT A FELLOW WARRIOR…

TO THE WARRIOR.

You are a true, strong warrior. 

I was very apprehensive on my way to see you.  It is finally time for me to forgive myself for the transgressions I covertly inflicted on certain others.   Today, you helped me accomplish what I have needed to do for many years.  You have let me free my soul from the burden it has been carrying.  At the time, I never realized that I could be hurting others who are like you…I did not even know you then.   It never even crossed my mind that I was hurting anyone.  But, now I have faced it and I have asked your forgiveness on behalf of those who may have been wounded by my actions.  The reason that I felt the need to do this is because I know about some of the pain you went through because of someone like me.  I believe you understood what I was trying to do.  I needed for the universe to forgive me.  Knowing that I could not go back to that time and ask all those ‘people’ to forgive what I did to them, I knew I could ask you and you would get the deeper meaning of that which I needed to be forgiven.  Talking to you so honestly meant a lot to me.  And the honesty with which you replied helped more that you will ever know.  I would have never been able to do this with our previous T.   

You are right ‘I’ have grown.  But, I never thought that ‘I’ had any wisdom to offer.  Thank you for saying I was wise.  No one has ever told ‘me’ that before and it was a shock.

I do not know why I do not come out more.  I suppose it is because of the ‘role’ I always played.  I suppose, too, that on some level, I fear I will have to play that ‘role’ again.  Even though that is not the case, the fear is still there.  I never want to be that person again.  And then there is the pain of the one I still ‘LOVE’.   It is so confusing.  I cannot make sense out of it.  I have often wondered how and why I could possibly ‘love’ him.  So, when I do see you again, I want to talk more about this.  It is something that I really need. 

So, thank you.  Teach me to be a warrior…please.

From:  ‘A  line’ the ‘ex-‘ ‘ex’ ‘M   ine’